Wednesday, November 28, 2007

The emails I get.

I love email. It's such an efficient way to communicate, most of the time. However, when one is making appointments, it is not. From the time I get your email and reply to it about times available, the chance that someone called in and made an appointment is very high. I am then in the position of waiting for a reply to outdated information, which will trigger another round of emails with the corrected "times available."

Not efficient at all. This is why if you email me in response to a Craigslist post, or after reading the website, I will encourage you to call me to set up an appointment. Whenever I see an email with the subject line of "I need a massage" or "Appointment?" I heave a little sigh. I don't want to be rude, after all, the person has made an effort to contact me and here I am asking them to do more, which goes against my customer service training.

And sometimes, when I open these emails, I don't have to do anything. A new scam has evolved where someone says they will send you a cashier's check for a months worth of services plus extra for some other costs, and you have to cash the check and send them back the extra monies. Occasionally, these emails are difficult to spot out at first and it's not until you have read a whole page of text do you realize what is being asked of you. But today I only had to read the first paragraph:

Hello.
My name is James . i am a new member of craigslist and i am in need of any therapeutic service for my 19 year old daughter. my daughter as been suffering from a severe pain due to a long term fracture on the left leg ribs. When my daughter was 18, she got an accident and was treated but ever since then she has been experiencing this pain on her left leg yearly.


Ok, bad translation software. That is excusable. Just to make sure I am not dismissing anyone out of hand, and also for fun, I scan the rest of the email to ascertain the goal. Another paragraph telling me how much pain the daughter is in and then this:

Since i am in spain,my CEO BOSS that i am work for here is willing to pay me an advance payment of my work with a check/money order in dollars. I am willing to send down this check/money order to you for your charges. i would like you to make some advance payment for one month for this services and i need to fly her back to the state immediatly we agree on this.

And there is the promise of advance payment for him and me. Interestingly worded with the truth. (My emphasis.) That's not very common. The next paragraph goes on to tell me that I must send my name, address, etc... so that they can mail me a check and how I am supposed to process it and send them back money. With all the constant references to his daughter's pain and that he is doing this for her, and I almost feel bad for giggling at the audacity of this person.

So ends my public service announcement regarding making appointments via email. Please always include your phone javascript:void(0)
Publish Postnumber in your emails and I will be able to efficiently make your appointment.

2 comments:

M.Yu said...

As a lifelong practitioner in the healing arts I have heard almost everything but this beats anything I have heard! Very funny!
I will be in Seattle in January and would very much enjoy seeing your place and meeting you. You are doing something I have wished to do for a long time. Combine and use, art, theater, healing and eroticism. My compliments.

regards, Mark Yu

Visual Art Director for the Seattle Erotic Art Festival said...

I would be honoured to give you a tour! I look forward to meeting you in January!.
~Sophia